deviant art

Deviant Login Shop
 Join deviantART for FREE Take the Tour
[x]
Download File
PDF, 464 KB
more ▶

More from ~SerinaHartwell

Featured in Groups:

Details

August 17, 2012
464 KB
Sta.sh
Link
Thumb

Statistics

Comments: 21
Favourites: 14 [who?]

Views: 467 (0 today)
Downloads: 17 (0 today)
[x]

It appears you don't have PDF support in this web browser. Download PDF

:iconserinahartwell:
Chapter one - ‘Hidden’. I'm a brand new writer called Serina Hartwell. I’m here to promote my book and work on getting it published. If you would like to read my writing, I would love know what you think (keep it constructive please). I know this won't be enough for some of you out there, so if you wish to read more, then please follow the link below:-

[link]

All I ask in return, for reading my book for free, is that you leave me a constructive comment on the Authonomy website, and if you really like it, and would like to support me, in publishing my first book, then please put me on your bookshelf, on the Authonomy site, and don't forget to recommend me to a friend!

I would like to thank Jasmine Varley AKA ‘CrazyTooner’, for her work on the book cover of ‘Hidden’. She is currently studying to be an animator, and took time out of her busy schedule. If you would like to see more of her work, please follow this link:- [link]

I thank you for taking the time out to read my work. Please enjoy, and thank you for your support.

Serina Hartwell
Author of Hidden & Trapped (coming soon)
[link]
If you like my work, then don't forget to recommend it to a friend. Thank you.

Bronte Hughes lives an ordinary life with a loving family and close network of friends, but after standing-up to the school bully, she is challenged to a dare at Farrow’s Mill, which goes disastrously wrong, shattering her reality in the process. A single act leads to a near fatal accident, which sets closely guarded wheels in motion, and leads her to fall for her best friend Riley.

A miscommunication sends them down separate paths, leaving her to face dealing with his rejection, while trying to come to terms with the fact, that everything in her world isn’t what it seems. She realises her world isn’t so flawless after-all, when everything starts to unravel around her, and the cracks begin to appear.

Can Bronte keep it together, and regain her first love, or will he reject her forever? Join Bronte as she learns the truth, and begins a journey of self-discovery where she finds she is the one who is different from those around her, and learns what her family have worked so hard to conceal from her, which is now set to turn her world upside-down.
Add a Comment:
 
love 0 0 joy 3 3 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconforestdwellerhouses:
Mood: Sociable *ForestDwellerHouses Apr 13, 2013  Professional Artisan Crafter
Ms. Serina, would you happen to know how I could get some of my carved fairy house pics in a book or some other type of media? Thank you for your time!
Reply
:iconserinahartwell:
~SerinaHartwell Apr 25, 2013  Professional Writer
Hi ForestDwellerHouses,

It's not as difficult as you might think, if you only want to put it, into a book for yourself. You could self publish it using the Lulu. Here's the link:- [link] or you could use a site like snapfish, if your work is photographic. Here's the link for this:- [link]

If you are wanting to get published, then that is a whole different ball game. It's hard, but if your work is top dollar, then I would always encourage you to go for it. I must impress on you though, that they are cut throat and will only accept your best work.

Firstly, get hold of a copy of Writers' & Artists' Yearbook. They produce one every year. This is my bible. Here's the link:- [link] You may be able to buy it cheaper on another site, so shop around and I believe that some libraries have a copy too. Take a look in there for the most relevant publisher for your work. You need to follow each individual company's criteria, to the letter. They are very fussy about that stuff. Expect to be turned down by the majority of companies that you send your stuff off to.

You could also look at some of the self publishing sites. I was recommended 'FastPencil' :- [link] by a friend. You could also just go straight to Amazon :- [link] I know other writer who have used this site.

If you are wanting to put your work out there, from a more promotional point of view, you could always take photographs of your work, put them to a slideshow with music (Powerpoint) and put them up on DeviantArt or Youtube or do a short film of your work and how you made them. Doing short tutorials on Youtube can bring decent followings if you make a series of them.

Anyway, I hope that was food for thought. Good luck and let me know how you get on. All the very best,

Serina Hartwell - Author of the Hidden Sage
Reply
:iconstar-blazer:
=star-blazer Dec 23, 2012  Professional Writer
This seems like an interesting premise from this chapter so far. The descriptions were beautiful in some places and the opening paragraph definitely caught my attention. You diction is lovely throughout, as well. I think, if anything, towards the end more there may be a tad too much dialogue going on (the description/details seem to cease a little), but I'm certain that after editing a few times, everything will fall into place and you'll find a comfortable balance that flows well. There were also a few grammatical errors here and there, but again, they can easily be caught with reading another time through. I think the one thing, however, that made this most difficult to read was the PDF format. Having it in two columns was rather distracting trying to read at first, but maybe that's just me. It was just a little difficult trying to read and see everything since it was squished together in two columns instead of blown up bigger on just one page.

Aside from those small things, however, I think this sounds like it's an interesting premise. I look forward to continuing to read more when I get some time and see what develops! Best of luck!

--Dorian
Reply
:iconserinahartwell:
Mood: Joy ~SerinaHartwell Jan 4, 2013  Professional Writer
Thank you so much Dorian for your critique. I always value it greatly.
Reply
:iconxlntwtch:
*xlntwtch Sep 25, 2012   Writer
I have no pdf :( ... Congrats on your DLD anyway.
Reply
:iconserinahartwell:
~SerinaHartwell Oct 3, 2012  Professional Writer
I am so sorry. Unfortunately, this is the format this website uses. I believe you can download a free Adobe Reader, which will read Pdf files. This may help.

Anyway, thank you so much for the congratulations. I am still on cloud nine and not scheduled to come back down, anytime soon.
Reply
:iconxlntwtch:
*xlntwtch Oct 4, 2012   Writer
:iconcloudsplz: Hello up there! My 'puter is so old and messed up I can't download Flash or Reader.
Reply
:icondailylitdeviations:
Your wonderful literary work has been chosen to be featured by =DailyLitDeviations in a news article that can be found here: [link]

Be sure to check out the other artists featured and show your support by :+fav:ing the News Article. Keep writing and keep creating.
Reply
:iconserinahartwell:
~SerinaHartwell Oct 2, 2012  Professional Writer
What a wonderful end to a really poor day. I discovered that my work had been featured after taking a sick day and nipping onto the site. From a lurgy filled day to cloud nine, I would like to send my gratitude out to all, with special thanks to NicSwaner who suggested my work and to LadyofGaerdon who featured my work, and gave me such a fantastic write-up.

You have made my day, and when I'm feeling better, I will do a celebratory dance around the room. Thank you to all who have followed my work and supported me. :D
Reply
:iconteano:
Hello Serina

In general, I approve of this piece. There's some conflict, build-up to the next chapter (this is a very important thing in any chapter), already a mention of a past and magical background that gets me thinking about possible story progression (I can't speak for others, but I'm sure other people will feel the same) and it's always fun to see children fighting :)

Your style is very easy on the eyes. You achieve a mood in the opening paragraphs rather than a visual description of what we should envision, which I think is good. This is very different from my own style, but I approve of it nevertheless as it makes for easy reading and sometimes that can be very refreshing.

Two problems I had (this might be just me, but I'm just saying it anyway) is that, due to the relatively fast pace, we get introduced to a lot of characters quickly. This is not a bad thing, but it can be kind of confusing. However, there's an easy way to solve this: you don't have to describe the characters thoroughly if it ruins your pace, but just give each of them 1 unique aspect we will remember them by. This can be everything from something they're wearing, an irritating voice, a constant glare, or just whatever you want to make of it :) The reader's brain will immediately go 'oh yeah, he's the guy with the-' and recognize the name easier whereas if we receive a lot of names quickly one after the other

Otherwise, I was confused as to the meaning of 'Yer'. This is probably me though, so it's more of a question than a critique.

I can't promise anything yet, but I may read and critique some more of your stuff later on. From what I can tell, you've done a good job so far not only with the writing but also getting it out there.

Just a personal question though, are you already publishing? I was wondering since it says Professional Writer next to your name :)

In any case, good luck and kind regards :)
Reply
Add a Comment: